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Why do you think that is, bud?

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It's not gay if it's for money
I'm not hard because you're touching me... It's just morning wood, I swear!
It doesn't count if you were too drunk to remember
You were tricked so it doesn't count!
Resist the urge and stay straight!
I'm not gay I'm just having fun!
Every guy gets these urges right?
I'm still straight if I was tricked right??
I'm straight but all I want to do is swallow!
If each of us pretends the other is a girl then it can't be gay!
It was so humiliating!
My bud was trying to tell me something but I was too distracted to listen!