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Nothing wrong with 2 buds working out together

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You don't want to be a virgin forever do you?
You're only doing it to help your bud out!
They put on a show for you, now you and your bud have to return the favor...
Funniest prank of my life they're all so gay now!
It's not gay if it's for money
I'm not hard because you're touching me... It's just morning wood, I swear!
Why do you think that is, bud?
It doesn't count if you were too drunk to remember
You were tricked so it doesn't count!
Resist the urge and stay straight!
I'm not gay I'm just having fun!
Every guy gets these urges right?